Moana review: Disney’s latest live-action voyage goes nowhere

Right, let’s get this out of the way first: Disney’s new live-action Moana is just about the most shameless cash-in I’ve seen in years. And that’s saying something, given the quality of some recent Hollywood output. I’ve got more respect for bottom-of-the-barrel disasters with a bit of spirit than I do for this – the only thing bold about Moana 2026 is how unashamed it is to photocopy itself.

A Remake So Lazy, It’s Basically a Switcheroo

You might think I’m exaggerating, but this film isn’t just ‘inspired by’ or ‘faithful to’ the animated original – it is, almost literally, the same movie again. Every major moment, every joke, and nearly every line of dialogue is a word-for-word replay of the 2016 film. If you’ve got Disney+, the old Moana is already sitting right there; you’re being asked to shell out for a version that’s only real difference is that it’s got real people in it. It’s uncanny, and not in a good way – even The Lion King’s 2019 remake fiddled around more with its source than this manages.

Thomas Kail at the Helm – Kind Of

Here’s where things get a bit odd. Thomas Kail, best known for his theatre work (he also directed that Hamilton recording on Disney+, and let’s be honest, not a film in the traditional sense), has been tapped by Disney to direct this. Makes sense when you consider Disney weren’t after a daring cinematic reinvention, but someone who’d dutifully colour inside the lines. It shows. Every time there’s a halfway attractive shot, it’s glaringly obvious Kail just traced over what John Musker and Ron Clements already did for the animated Moana. Put it this way: if you copied all your mate’s test answers, would you expect a gold star? Of course not, because you didn’t actually do the graft.

Ryan Gosling recently summed it up perfectly while promoting Project Hail Mary: 'It’s not your job to keep movie theatres open, it’s our job to make things that make it worth you coming out.'

And that’s the rub – Disney, recently, really isn’t doing that. Not with this one.

Carbon Copy or Just Copy

In case you were hoping for some twist: Dwayne Johnson is back as Maui and Jemaine Clement returns as Tamatoa, both seemingly tasked with reciting their old lines as if this were some surreal karaoke session. No fresh jokes, no new story beats – it’s as if you asked a chatbot to run the animated film through a live-action filter. And hey, at least a chatbot might have tried to change a punchline or two.

Where the Remake Fails (By the Numbers)

• Gags fall flat: The animated Moana has great little visual jokes and expressive reactions – like Gramma Tala’s ghost stories or that hilarious kid in Moana’s dance class. In the live-action, those moments are either dulled down, awkwardly cropped, or just missing. Instead of getting something clever or new, we’re looking at cut-down, watered-down versions that simply don’t land.
• Visuals: The original’s bright, colourful animation is swapped for the sort of drab, flattened cinematography studios love these days – dull, even lighting, little depth, nothing that snaps.
• Cast changes: Sure, there’s a new Moana – Catherine Laga'aia – but when every other aspect is welded to the blueprint, what chance does she have to do anything new? Not much, frankly.
• No innovation: If you think of truly great remakes (Carpenter’s The Thing, Cronenberg’s The Fly, De Palma’s Scarface, Soderbergh’s Ocean’s 11), all of them had their own point of view and something to say. Disney’s Moana is so beholden to the past, it’s afraid to try anything remotely interesting – the risk of fun, let alone controversy, is absent.

Disney’s Calculated Bet

Why does this exist then? Honestly, it’s corporate autopilot. Disney has been ruling the world with sequels and remakes. They’ll rake in the cash from Toy Story 5 and The Devil Wears Prada 2, and sometimes the big original swings – things like Hoppers or Elio – need funding from these safer bets. They’re not unaware that audiences are getting wise to the game, but streaming, flops like Strange World and Wish, and shifting viewing habits have left them scrambling for things people will reliably show up for. The result? A conveyor belt of IP regurgitation.

No Risk, No Reward

But here’s the hardest knock: this film is so scared of being different, so determined not to rock the boat, that it ends up feeling hollow and pointless. At least Mulan’s live-action take tried something fresh (even if it fell flat). Moana? It’s the safe choice, but so safe it’s offensive – the creative equivalent of serve-by-numbers. If you want to hear kids’ dialogue again or see live humans mumble jokes that were funny when animated, this is for you. Otherwise, you’re better off sticking with the original.

Score: 4/10

If you’re keeping track, that’s 'Poor': the negatives outweigh anything positive, and finishing it is a bit of a slog.